The distinctive threatening atmosphere of the night has the nape of my neck on its ends. An invisible emanation of lurk. My phone is dead, I can not alert the man to wait for me by the bus stop. This drop off is a famous mug spot. I jump out of the kombi my heart…
Prompt : Hate It
hate it… When things don’t explode as I walk away… When saucy dogs hump other people’s legs… When molotov cocktails don’t break on the first throw… When theme music doesn’t play as I enter the vicinity… When being ordained an e-minister doesn’t strike fear in the hearts of children… When I buy a lab coat and…
Listen Up Kirk Frost #LHHATL Season 6
Kirk, Kirk, my man Kirk. Do you know how much I had invested in your marriage with Rasheeda? Emotions, hope, trust and I even gave you a second chance when you threw that apology party for my girl Rasheeda. I believed you. That party had fifty shades of sincerity and new found respect for you…
Stop Posting Pictures Of Corpses on Social Media!
I woke up all chirpy and bright this morning. This is rare, I hate mornings, I hate waking up and if I had it my way I would sleep in till mid day. But today I was on an endorphin high. So, here I am, scrolling down my Facebook news feed then bam, a gruesome,…
Goodbye My Lover
Reminiscing about the love you gave me Hiden under the cloak of chivalry, I couldn’t save me The glistening sweat on my body you made me Screaming, digging my nails into your flesh, can you blame me? Finding your affections veer in the opposite direction But what is the point when I still hurt in…
The Memoirs of the Other Woman
I never thought I would ever tell this story, but now I am in better space. No, I have moved on, exactly where I want to be, happy and emotionally fulfilled. So yeah I can tell this story because today, it is hilarious and we can laugh at my pain together. Imagine crushing on someone…
The Mad King
DISCLAIMER: This blog entry is a work of fiction. Names, characters,places,brands and incidents are either the product of the bloggers imagination or are used fictitiously. Any similarity to real life situations or persons is purely coincidental. “His high majesty is still asleep your Grace”, Gumbo announced to the queen who lay on a massage table…
A Letter to You Fickle Earthlings
Dear Humans, Sincerest apologies for our complete lack of correspondence lately. In our defense, the exponential increase in your defenses, angry approach to existential questions, self destructive natures, and general weirdness kinda warranted the absence. Nevertheless, we’d like to clarify a few misnomers for your edification: 1. We don’t make crop circles. Those are bored farmers with ADHD and a large…
10 Things You Need to Teach Your Children At an Early Age.
One thing that really riles me up to bat shit crazy levels is child abuse. The world can be big huge ball of fecal matter and monsters but can we leave children the hell alone? Okay, I am ranting aren’t I? My apologies, I get so emotional about child abuse and today’s blog is about…
The Curse of a Resting Bitch Face.
All my life, literally all my life I have been fighting the emotionless, angry, irritated, contemptuous expression that comes naturally to me. I have to remind myself to smile, get my facial muscles to loosen and create some sort of friendly looking face. But unconsciously, I revert back to the infamous Resting Bitch Face. I…
What Zimbabwean Women Think about Zimbabwean Men.
So, I did a rather sketchy social media survey, on Facebook, Twitter, SnapChat, Instagram and WhatsApp. I asked women on their thoughts and views about Zimbabwean men. I could have used the online monkey survey tool for a specific questions and responses but whoa that would be a lot of work. So, I let…
The Shape of Things to Come
Gosh, why do I have to use public transport today? Pregnancy back aches and round ligament pains do no get along with these raggedy ass kombis. I am so irritated right now. I want to punch something. It takes me 10 minutes to climb into a kombi and actually settle down, while an impatient conductor…
