Here is the thing, if you see a pregnant woman be nice to her, smile, and show some kindness because she is going through a hell unknown to most. The experience is comparable to the sweet nectarine taste of grape fruit and the unexpected harsh after taste. The beauty of bringing a new life into the world and the discomforts accompanied with it.
1. Hormonal Mood Swings
Hormonal fluctuations for pregnant women is like a seesaw. One minute we are laughing, the next we feel like crying for no apparent reason. Sometimes I look at the man and get all mushy inside within the same breath I want to strangle him. I am telling you pregnancy is crazy. Last night his face was mad annoying and just looking at him made me angry. I searched for reasons to pick a fight with him.
Me: I know what you are thinking of
Him: Excuse me?
Me: Why is your nose scrunched up like that? Are you implying that I smell bad? Huh?!
Him: what? No babe, I-
Me: I am done with this marriage. It’s over!
Poor man, cowers further into the couch while I storm out. See for men, they don’t physically carry a fetus but they definitely carry everything that connotes with pregnancy. I get the nuance ” We” are pregnant. I feel terrible for using him as my outlet to vent but this hormonal imbalance gets the best of me. While on rare occasions all I want is to pamper, spoil and cater to him. It’s a wild emotional rollercoaster, a steep, slippery slope of turmoil and unpredictable changes.
This must the worst pregnancy discomfort after nausea and morning sickness. I can’t speak of the latter because the universe spared me. Now that I am in my third trimester, I have gained almost 10kilos and my centre of gravity in turn is leaning forward. A simple task of turning and changing sides during sleep is a nightmare. If I want to change sleeping position, I have to sit up first and face the side I want, before slowly easing on to the bed. My back can not allow me to make sudden movements not to mention my pelvic bone which is softening in preparation for delivery. I can’t throw my feet on the floor from the bed. The pain sears around by waist to the pelvic area. I can’t sit for long hours because yeah, my back neither can I stand for long as well. Getting up from the couch is mission impossible. The most wonderful thing is I can’t reach my feet anymore so here comes the man. He washes my feet, fetches things for me and the heavenly back massages. Although he has to endure one heavy thigh thrown on his back all night. Apparently its the most comfortable and painless position to sleep in. Walking on its own takes its toll on my back, so excuse me if you see me limping and waddling like a duck. It’s my back and pelvic bone giving me hell.
3. Pregnancy Isomania & Fatigue
This is actually a thing, can you believe it? This is a pregnancy demon, I mean we are ladened with this burden, hence we are always tired and require a lot of resting. Then in comes insomnia? Who summoned this demon? I want my adequate sleep! I am telling you it’s like clockwork, like a bad scene from the movie Conjuring. 2am I am wide awake and blinking in the darkness like a damn coyote. 5am sleep sneaks in but oh no, I have a toddler so 7am this woman here is up because Malik said so. The day is long and full of lethargy. I do take afternoon naps but what’s a nap if you have to pee every five minutes? That takes us to number four.
4. Toilet Trips
These toilet trips are annoying to say the very least. The infamous hallmark of the third trimester. Oh hail the god of the bladder. Frequent urination has nothing to do with the actual toilet trip. I am talking about leakage. Yes, a lot of urine leaks before rear-end touches the toilet seat. You laugh,leak,sneeze,leak, cough, leak, or leak due to delay of making thee trip to the toilet. Remember getting up is a task on its own, waddle to the toilet and oh well it might be too late then oops, leak. What is life when you have a human being lounging on your bladder? Frequent urination also contributes to insomnia because in one night you have to wake up at least five times to urinate. The fun part about it, is when we are pressed to pee, we rush to the toilet only to pass out a drop of urine. A drop. You gotta love pregnancy!
5. Gestational Diabetes
8% of pregnant women are diagnosed with this prenatal complication. Guess what? Yours truly is part of that 8%, what are the odds? From my blog The Shape of Things to Come I mentioned suspicions of diabetes. Well it was recently confirmed that I have gestational diabetes. What a kick. So I am on a strict no carb and sugar diet. Wow, you would think pregnancy is the only time you get to eat like an unruly swine. Is this what I get for eluding morning sickness? So I am trying my best to stick to this diet to avoid birth complications and an over weight diabetic baby. In addition to taking copious amounts of water as if my trips to the toilet aren’t enough. The awesome part is after delivery the diabetes goes away. 8weeks to go, I can definitely manage.
6. Skin Changes
Due to hormonal fluctuations during pregnancy the skin pigmentation is often altered. I understand some women get lighter or darker and also blotched patches on the face. As for me I have the infamous mask of pregnancy around my neck. My neck is several shades darker than my face giving the illusion of amateur attempt to bleach my face. No I am not trying any skin lightening creams. I love my complexion as it is. It’s this pregnancy going cray cray. As for stretch marks I can’t really tell now. I have been religiously applying coconut oil on my belly, as far as stretch marks can touch me? I think not.
I have the most absurd craving! Craving these famous Zimbabwean dates called “masau” and it’s peak season. Look at God. On a normal day I will never touch these things, matter of fact I hate masau. Like I said this pregnancy is insane and I have consumed enough for a life time. I have learnt you can never plan a craving, I don’t even know how this works but I really wish I had a more palatable craving. Cravings are so crazy and irrational sometimes I wake up at midnight for that bowl of masau. I have them in my purse everywhere I go.
Pregnancy is a beautiful thing, the fact that my body is nourishing another life is more than amazing. All these discomforts are nothing compared to holding my baby girl in my arms. That’s right, the final ultrasound scan revealed that it’s a girl! Yay! 8 weeks to go before baby Zuva arrives. We are so excited! Other than that, I thrive as mother to-be, with unshaven nethers. I didn’t type that, it’s the pregnancy…told you it was crazy.